Married ladies... if you found out your spouse cheated but chose to stay in the marriage to work it out...?

How did you get over the anger, hurt and rage? I am four weeks into finding out that my husband and friend had a ';flirting'; relationship meaning, they would kissy kissy when I would get up to go to the bathroom, play footsies under the table, etc. They both say nothing more happened other than kissing and I have no choice but to believe them if I am going to make this work. She's officially out of my life btw, I am no fool... but before this our marriage was wonderful, loving, sincere, a true partnership and I think it is worth fighting for, as long as he works towards making sure it never happens again. If you have gone through similar, I could really use some good advice, examples of how you dealt with the tough times, etc. Thank you...Married ladies... if you found out your spouse cheated but chose to stay in the marriage to work it out...?
I found out last May that my husband had made out with another woman at a bar while out at his sister's HS graduation. After I found out, I confronted him and told him I should leave him for it. He asked me not to, so I relented with the condition that it never happens again and that I would leave if there was a next time. It took a LONG time to get over the anger, hurt, and rage. It also took even longer to be able to trust him again; and he's currently deployed overseas (and has been since November 7) so the trust is even harder now. I dealt with it by putting on the guilt trip, making him talk about it, and sometimes using the silent treatment; 2 of which I'm not particularly proud of, but that was the only way I knew how to deal with it. The only advice I can give you on this subject is to be strong, stand your ground, don't forgive too easily, don't TRUST again too easily, and follow your heart. I personally still haven't got over it. It's not something you'll be able to forgive easily and you'll never be able to completely forget about it, but the good news is that it does get easier and, believe it or not, the hurt does fade over time.





I hope things work out for you. If you want to talk more on this, just message me and I'd be happy to. = ]Married ladies... if you found out your spouse cheated but chose to stay in the marriage to work it out...?
An ex also cheated, but in our case it was way worse than that. I couldn't get over it so I left. In your case you might be able to fogive, since it doesn't seem like he had a long drawn out sex thing on the same scale as mine. As for time who knows, I would demand him to go to a counselor with you though.
he is a bad husband and she is a bad friend so totally get that ***** out of your life...


but anyways how do you know nothing else happen between them???


i dont think u never going to get over it they both betrayed you...but if u think u could work things


out try 2 live the past in the past..but u never going to forget about it u always going to have anger inside..
wow how sad your husband and best mate, that's gonna take a lot for your husband to get you to forgive, make him pay big time, Diamonds, jimmy choo, gucci etc come to mind, but seriously good luck i hope you can get over this and your marriage gets back on track xx
The fact that they did it right under your nose would really bother me! I hope you can work it out. Forgive and forget is what people say. Unfortunately you will never forget. I hope you are able to forgive. Only you can decide if he is worth it :)
baby i`m so sad to hear that , my x husband also cheats me %26amp; divorce me for the same reason


honey keep try to fixed ur marriage , if your husband loving u he will be back inshalla


if not you must start over with someone really loving u


good luck ...
NOPE!





LEAVE HIM ... once a cheater ... always a cheater!
It takes a lot of hard work on both sides. Talk to him and make him answer all the questions that I know is going through your mind. Check out their story to see if they are being truthful. Your biggest question to him should be why. Don't let him fool you because there is a why. Tell him that you want him to be honest with you . Affairs usually begin when one partner feels that the marriage is lacking something. It could be a feeling of being attractive or closeness or simply someone to talk to. They feel that feeling with the other women. The key to making the marriage work is to find out what this is so you can work towards solving the problem. You will never forget the affair but you can not bring it up if you want the marriage to work.Trust is something he will have to work hard to rebuild. There will be many times when he is away from home that you will doubt him. If you need to secretly watch him to prove to yourself that he isn't seeing the other women then do so. As time goes by , you will find that you are questioning his actions less and less. You have to let go of the anger before you can talk rationally about the problems. Good luck
Im gonna have to be honest with you It alll depends on what type of person you are A)Can you let the past go for real?AND B) are you the forgiving type of person that can just let it go and move on?......I have been in a similar situation and the only reason why I am here today with the same man is because of my kids!! TRUST is STILL an issue ,BEING over a year down the road...(he went home with sum chick drunk at a bar and SLEPT there BUT says nothing happened??? Im not an idiot I knoe what happened lol) I am doing my best to build up the trust we once had but YES it still hurts and I think it will always be in the back of my mind ...it sucks I WISH YOU LUCK HUN=)