HELP ME! PLEASE!!!!! THE BEST ANSWER GETS 10 POINTS?

I don't even know where to begin about this. I just feel so alone and so pissed and frustrated and just UGH!! but I just really want to know how some of you guys deal with knowing that your spouse/significant other is having sexual thoughts and feelings towards other women and or men. Some say that I should just be happy that he isn't cheating on me, others say that it's healthy but i just believe in my heart that if you truly love someone that you just can't think of any other person in the same way that you think of the one that you are so called ';in love with';. I love my husband very much and i can honestly say that I do not think about other men in any sexual way, i barely think anything about them at all. I know this sounds like a lie and like i am obsessed with him or something but that's not true. I just really need some advice on how to deal with this and maybe someone else that feels the same way that I do just so that i don't have to feel so alone and hurt all of the time. This is a very controversial topic so any input is appreciated. Just please be truthful and not rude... the best answer gets the points.HELP ME! PLEASE!!!!! THE BEST ANSWER GETS 10 POINTS?
I agree with you that you can think only of one person. I've always been that way with my current husband. If he has thoughts about any one else, believe me, he is very good at hiding them!





Now, my first husband was a different story. That man would break out in a sweat if a woman with big boobs walked by. It made me mad, but he just didn't seem to be able to control himself. Yes, he would stare, and he might say something like look at that. But he never said anything sexual about them because I would have popped him in the jaw. I didn't like the way he looked at other women, but he was in his 20's and that can be an immature age. RIP, Ronnie!HELP ME! PLEASE!!!!! THE BEST ANSWER GETS 10 POINTS?
all best answers get 10 points.
we as humans have adownfall its called lust. doctors will tell you men think of sex every 30 seconds or so. right now his brain is taking over and causing him to wander as long as he doesnt perform the act or caught in the act you still can win the war. sit him down and talk to him and explain you will not put up with any nonsense if he deceides to end up in the sack with another person. he may think about lusting but not doing.
You seem highly insecure.





Think of it like this... Window shopping. You can look, but don't touch.





And thinking that just because he is looking means he wants sex only fuels your insecurity.
How did you even find out about it?





Yes it is completely normal for married/committed people to have sexual attraction to other people. If you can't deal with that, dump this guy and find one who will lie to you. Sexual fantasies are normal, and healthy. Why are people so afraid of SEX?
According to the Bible, this constitutes cheating as we call it and thats about as high an authority one can go to. People are different so we all react to normal situations in our own way, not that anyones way is better or worse than anothers but it happens. The most one can pray for is that our mates dont act upon their thoughts. No one can control anothers thoughts so we rely on their upbringing that its similar to ours. Youre probably the exception to the rule here which makes you special but for one special person to find another special person is extremely rare. Youre just going to have to find a way to ignore this or itll eat you alive. You can change your hubby on the outside but almost impossible on the inside. Just keep reminding him ';its not having what you want but wanting what you have.'; You may have to seek professional help to deal with this on your own but worth it. Good luck
all men have thoughts on this topic but a good one would never act on it,men are hard wired to think about it but actually only a small percentage ever act on it, to hear people on here you would think otherwise but the statistics show that over all most men are true to their spouses... girlfriends are a different matter though. men will cheat on a girlfriend because they dont have a whole lot to lose like a house and motorcycles ect..
promises promises.
You ever hear that Men are from mars and women are from venus? that is so true. Like you i don't think about other men, but men are all about sex so that is what they think about 75% of the time. the other times they are thinking about food and there car. So don't take this personally as though he does not want you, it is Truly in his make up and that we women will never be able to change. Women were made to differently in that aspect. hope this helps you.
When you are married you basically don't have time to be fooling around, because your are so busy in building the beautiful marriage life around your spouse and children. Something like this should never even cross your mind once your married to a beautiful spouse. GL
I totally agree with you. I am so in love with my hubby that the thought of looking at other men in sexual ways does not do anything for me. I would be hurt if I knew my hubby was looking at other women in a sexual way. Now I am sure folks do this every second of the day but I bet the smart ones don't discuss this with their spouse or sig. other because it would cause lotsa issues within the relationship.





Mary in Camden, MI
Hes bi, Id move on.
i'll say you are naive


to tell a man to ignore other women who are pretty is a sure sign of your insecurity


your man knows there are prettier women that you


there always will be


just like there are better looking guys than your husband


and he knows that too


the porn industry is based on the very premise that men have a wide range of sexual fantasies and thus look at other women and undress them with their eyes


you can bury your head in the sand and pretend this does not happen, but it does


so as long as he does not act on it, it's normal
you should use a spell to give you courage
Do you know for sure if he has sexual feeling to wards others- or are you just imagining it ? It is difficult to give you a genuine answer without knowing this- like has he told you he desired others ?
All HAPPILY married ppl think this way ... its oppisite when they think they are not happy ... ! Hint here ...There are many women without a backbone who stay b/c they cannot leave ... MEN TOO!!
I'm not even sure what you are asking... in fact, I'm not even sure YOU know what you are asking.





This appears to be a rambling rant, that you don't ever think about other men, but you are upset that he might.





Why?





Are you hugely obese? Are your teeth bad? Are you unclean?, Is your house a mess?





Guys, hon think way differently about women than women think about men.





Guys think about sex..... sex with anyone and any thing likely 6 times every minute, I read in one study. Guys are built for sex... that's what they do.





They look at porn way more often than women, and undress women as they look at them... evolution made them that way. They have affairs far more often than do women, and when their little head is filled with blood, the big head is no longer on.





So, yes, you are making a big deal of nothing.





Do you have a job?





If not, maybe you ought to get one.





You sound like you have too much time on your hands....





I don't mean to be at all rude, but sweetie, If you love your husband, and he is a loyal man and husband to you, what is your problem.





Never worry too much about what a guy says, as my dad always reminded me, worry about what he does, and believe what he does, not what he says.