Would you now get to know this person and have some form of relationship with them?
Or demand your spouse keep it a secret from family %26amp; friends?Could you love a baby (like your own) that is born of your spouses affair OR never want to met the love child?
I would leave the marriage with my children. I could not possibly share my husband with another woman while they raise their child together. I would feel too betrayed and what is to say he would not do it again and again? What if that woman decided she wanted child support and other support? It would be my children suffering because my husband has to be a he whore. There would be no secret. Why should he get off the hook so easy? I feel since this new child will be related to everyone, everyone in the family should know. The question is, would my husband put up with that kind of behavior from me? I bet not! So, my answer is NO, I would NOT stay with my husband should he do such a terrible thing like that to me. Also no, I would not want to see his illegitimate child either and no, I could never hold it or love it like my own. I would be too upset for such a thing.
EDIT: Why the thumbs down for honest answers?Could you love a baby (like your own) that is born of your spouses affair OR never want to met the love child?
Thanks. I never figured it was you giving thumbs down, I just put it on there to ask the one who was. Again, thank you for choosing my answer.
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Cheating I might eventually be able to get past, but with a child in the picture I think I'd have to let him go. I don't think I could handle the daily reminder that he would have to interact in any way with that woman - and the child would be a visible reminder of his betrayal. I would have to leave because I would not want to let the child pay the price for his father's behavior and I just don't think I could treat that child the smae as my own.
If you as an adult are choosing to stay in the relationship then you do have a responsibility to acknowledge the child and treat them respectively. My step children are 15 and 14, they were conceived during the marriage. My husband and I got them when they were 1 and 2 then my husband left, I have always had them and wouldn't have it any other way. It wasn't easy at first but these were my children's siblings and now I love them as much as if I had given birth to them. There are no easy answers at this point but some can be more rewarding than others.
If my fiance had an affair and a child was born, I would walk away from the relationship and leave him to handle it himself. I couldnt bear to stand by relive the betrayal and humiliation, whilst he continues contact with the mother and child. I dont think he would have the right to ask me to continue with him and keep trying after he committed the ultimate betrayal, and I would feel justified in leaving, for my own sanity.
What a mess !
For me, every time I see the child from the affair, it will remind me that MY husband, who promised to love and honor me, cheated and had this kid out of that adultery. It will be a reminder to the pain he caused me and our family. When someone cheats, the best way to get over it is to put it in the past and move forward ... but that becomes impossible when the result of that affair is right under my nose, eating my food in my home. This situation, with the kid spending time with dad, would make it impossible to ever be free of it and to move on.
The right thing to do for the best interest of the child is to encourage a relationship with my husband so that the child knows who it's father is ... it's not the best thing for ME, or for my marriage, but it's what's best for the kid. I could never love it like my own ... no way.
I would never take it out on the kid. However, a person would have to be either a saint, or inhuman, to not let it get to them from time to time.
I'd have a hard time getting past it, and wanting to be intimate with him.
The answer should be yes. A child is blameless for the indiscretion of their parents. One does not chose the situation or circumstance under which they are born.
So if my spouse had a child via an affair I would certainly not take out my anger on the child. He or she is by blood a sibling to our children. I would not be as kind to the ';adults'; who put the child in these circumstances.
What does he need to do to you for you to leave him.
He had an affair and produced a love child. That means he was having unprotected sex with someone else.
He could have brought an STD or even worse AIDS to you.
I would be so out of there.
Leave lady. This man does not respect you or have any regards for his married life.
You would look a fool trying to embrace this child.
He needs to be in his childs life which equals being in his mistress home ever so often.
Please leave this situation for your own good.
first of all he cheated on you and now he has a kid with her,well I haved lived a long time and been through a few relationships,but if someone cheated on you that to me is like a slap in the face,there are to many decent men in the world to get than stay with a loser like that and the home wrecker he has a kid by.I would have more respect for myself than to think i was put behind a whore,and you are still with the creep,you must not think much of yourself ,be smart kick him to the curb,take out the trash, but go find you a real man,cause what you have there is not a real man, what is wrong with you younger women ,you are better than that ,honey throw the tuna back in the water and go for the cavier
if my husband were to cheat on me and have a baby with that woman sh*t he would give up all his right asap and i would make him suffer and thing that im cheating on him for the next year or so while ill be looking for mr. right.
but really i would not stick around it would just be pointless and too much drama, and heartache
If I decided to move past the infidelity I would have to have some kind of relationship with the child's mother. It isn't the fault of the child that my husband was an idiot. The child deserves to know their father and family.
Thumbs up for riverrat715
i would never even try to deal with it. i would leave and get a divorce as soon as i found out he was cheating especially if the other girl got pregnant! Marriage is supposed to be sacred and then he goes and knocks up someone else? im wouldn't stick around for that
sure- its not the baby's fault. assuming you got over the affair part and are trying to make the marriage work, the baby needs to have some knowledge of his/her paternal family.
Yes, I could and did. We ended up with the child and her mother just faded away into whatever. This child is now 18 years old and I couldn't love her more if she were my own.
No dump them! IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN!
I would divorce him for sure. But if you choose to stay you have to let this child get to know his dad and its siblings.
Never, i can like him but will never love him as my own
nope......divorce all the way.......... and good luck with your kid and the dead beat dad. Hope it was worth it.
I wouldn't stick around to 'deal with it'.
I have more dignity than that.
thanks for asking.
nop
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